So I was invited to a work function last week. A social work function. With people I hardly know. At a private residence. This is scary for me as I prefer to stay in the comfort of my own home surrounded by the people and things that help me feel.....well, comfortable. But I thought this was important to attend as a team-building activity. To both feel like I am part of the team as well as let my coworkers know that yes, indeed, I AM part of this team. So show up I did.
Showing up is half the battle. Actually, getting myself to show up is the entire battle. Part of my initial anxiety was a lack of an arrival time so I did not know when other people would be showing up. Arriving at places (and departing places), especially the more intimate setting of a private residence, causes me great social anxiety. As a way to help ease that, I decided that I was going to arrive a bit early and monitor the parking situation to try to time my arrival with the arrival of another coworker so that we could walk in together.
Well, I made it to the home and noticed there were no other cars parked on the street. Instead of just showing up like a normal person, I decided to circle the block a few times to wait for that elusive coworker. Now, this is in a neighborhood of well-to-do folks who live in very big and nice homes. My car does not quite fit in. It is rusty. Clunky. Loud. Has kayak racks in the up position on the roof. In other words, I stood out like a sore thumb driving around the block no less than a dozen times. Thankfully, the guy digging dirt on the corner seemed to be oblivious each time I drove past him.
One time, I pulled up across the street from my destination and as I was looking over my shoulder, I drove my car into the curb which caused me to honk my horn. CLUNK! HONK! Horrified, I sped away with sweat dripping down my brow. I sure hope nobody saw me; but in times of today, most people have cameras and such so maybe I gave someone a good laugh.
My bladder started yelling at me and I had to pee something fierce. I drove around searching for a perfect spot to relieve myself....only such a spot did not exist. Alas, just ahead, a porta potty in the yard of a big beautiful home! As I drove nearer to it, there was a crew of men doing some landscaping work....no way could I bring myself to use that! It was like the Universe was taunting me. I held in my urine and went another round. Still no work buddies.
One more time around the block, and frantic texts to my lady for support, and I decided to just go for it. Still no cars, but I can walk up and alert my hostess that I am here. Or can I? I did. I walked up onto the porch only to turn back around and head back to my car. Instead of knocking or ringing the door bell, I decided to text her to let her know I arrived. Before too long, I see her standing on her porch, waving to me to come on in!
So I once again make my way up her walk and got to her door only to find she has a misbehaving dog who I accidentally let loose! So that made things quite awkward. Thankfully before she went after her dog, she spontaneously led me to her bathroom where I could pee and breathe. By the time I exited the bathroom, the dog was back inside and I was a little calmer.
The gathering was quite nice, but the whole time I was there, I kept thinking how I had to leave. I gave myself a time limit I wanted to leave by....except I had had a margarita. That delayed my self imposed exit time.
Still, somehow I made it there alive and made it out alive. And now I feel a little bit more a part of this team I have been working with for over a year now. Plus maybe I built up some muscles for future social events such as this one.
