Connecting Again (Part 2)

Christmas of 2021 prompted me to reach out to my niece Shayna, who has been absent from the family for 20 years or more!  After Leanne (her mom) and Bill got divorced, Leanne brainwashed Shayna into believing bad things about Bill and our family. Leanne withheld cards and presents and even stooped so low as to falsify an email from Shayna to Bill saying she wanted nothing to do with her dad.  Feeble attempts at reaching out has fallen flat.  Too much time, too much anxiety, and too much hurt has prevented any real relationship from growing.

Well, I got real brave and decided to apologize for past mistakes and invited Shayna to reconnect by going out to dinner.  She was brave herself and agreed!

With excitement and apprehension, we set a date and did not cancel.  Though we both were secretly hoping the other would do just that.  First meeting was awkward.  A hug and some nervous laughter preceded our meal, but once we sat down, it was surprisingly easy and natural.  She mentioned how she couldn't stop looking at me, seeing herself in my face.  I couldn't stop staring at her for the beautiful young woman she had become.  Regret was present for both of us as we realized all the wasted years that we can not get back.  I missed watching her grow.  She missed my guidance and love when her own mother could not provide that for her.  

But we have now, and we have decided we are going to build a relationship from here.  Our talk was crazy relatable.  Our lives are eerily similar.  And now that we are connecting, perhaps Shayna and her dad can reconnect as well.  They need each other, and time is limited.  

So yeah, reconnecting with my family has been wonderful.  Yet Bittersweet.  With reconnection come the reminders of the losses.  People I've lost.  Time that has been lost.  The only thing to do is move forward from here, knowing better and doing better.  

Setting out to 2022 with the intention to be the best version of me I can be.  Cheers!